Abusive relationships come in many forms. Even though physical abuse is usually easy to identify and recognize, emotional and mental abuse can be subtler and harder to detect, even when the victim.
Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse which is especially insidious. Gaslighting, also known as microaggression, is a psychological manipulation technique in which an abuser attempts to make the victim doubt their reality, their own perceptions, and themselves.
Questions to Ask Yourself
Here are some questions you can ask yourself if you’re not certain whether you are being gaslighted:
- Do You Constantly Apologize, Even When Uncertain Why?
- Do You feel that your partner is trying undermine your relationship with others?
- Does the partner you trust undermine your own self-confidence?
- Does the partner you share your life with minimize or ignore your achievements and successes?
- Does your partner seem to be constantly changing the rules?
- Do you hear that you overreact, misunderstand, or are too sensitive often?
- Do you feel that your values and goals are questioned?
- Do You feel that your partner is trying your control your thoughts or behavior?
- Does the partner you live with deny reality or twist it to their own advantage, even if they are presented with evidence that proves otherwise?
- Does the partner you have make you question your memory or perceptions of events?
- Does the partner you have make you question your judgement and ability to make decisions?
You may be experiencing gaslighting if any of these questions are answered with a yes. You might want to reach out to someone for support, such as a family member, friend, counselor or therapist.
Why gaslighting is toxic
Once the gaslighting is understood, you can see how harmful and toxic it can be.
Gaslighting is a way to undermine your self-confidence and your self-trust. It can make you doubt your judgment and your perception of the world.
You may feel alone and isolated, cut off from the support network.
It’s easy to rationalize and to ignore the problem. “Maybe there was a miscommunication or misunderstanding,” “Maybe that person is right.” I am overreacting.”
It can make you distrustful and untrusting of others.
Gaslighting may make you think you are going insane or that you have something wrong.
These effects can have a serious impact on your mental health and emotional well-being.
You must seek help if your relationship has been contaminated by gaslighting. Speak to a trusted family member or friend, or seek professional therapy or counseling. You deserve a supportive, healthy relationship. One that lifts you up, supports your viewpoint, and not one that brings you down or makes you doubt your reality.
